Hugs and cuddles

Yes, hugs and cuddles… but bear with us…

Often underrated and misunderstood, hugs, especially big hugs, and cuddles are two of the most natural ways to show friendship, closeness and affection. Consensual touch, including hugs and cuddles, may also help lower stress, ease anxiety and support the body to settle. What’s not to like?!

Not every touch has to be a come-on, a negotiation or the opening scene of something involving lube.

Whether between mates or partners, hugs and cuddles are often best enjoyed as a thing in themselves, without ulterior motives or hidden agendas.

Be mindful that cuddling can be read as an exploratory step between “friends” or as a prelude to sex, though cuddling can be a big turn-off if sex is always the endgame. We can also get carried away, particularly if we misread signals.

Some men love touch. Some freeze, flinch or simply do not want it. Neither needs a courtroom explanation. Ask, notice, and don’t sulk if the answer is no.

There’s more about Hugs and cuddles in our Sex section.

Sometimes we just like to be held by another guy, or to hold a guy. When it’s wanted, it can boost our mood, dispense with words, and help us feel better about each other and ourselves.

So, make your intentions clear: a touch on the arm rather than a hand on his crotch, or a gentle rub on his shoulder rather than fingertips snaking down to his arse crack.

If you’re loved-up with a new guy, lots of cuddles can add an important dimension to the relationship, helping to develop intimacy, confidence and trust.

A good hug is not a trap. It has a beginning, a middle and, crucially, an end.