Sex and consent
More about sex and consent
What Kevin Spacey’s sexual assault charge and gay bars have in common | Out (US) | 10 Jan 2019
Chemsex exemplifies much wider issues with drugs and sexual consent | The Conversation | 3 Apr 2018
Why hasn’t the gay community had a #MeToo moment? | The Guardian | 7 Mar 2018
Consent: Why is it still such a big issue in gay clubs? | Gaydar Insider | 1 March 2018
The buts of butts: why we need to talk about the complexity of consent as gay men | Huff Post | 10 Nov 2017
Consent and chemsex information for gay and bi men in London | GALOP/ Survivors UK/ London Friend
Consent and the gay community | GMFA | FS 2017, FS 162
What consent looks like | USA | RAINN (Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network)
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How gay men normalize sexual assault by Phillip Henry | 17 Nov 2017
In the bonfire that has been sexual assault allegations over the past few weeks, a lot of chatter has kept the fire burning and, as gay men, what we don’t talk about is that Kevin Spacey and George Takei are part of a much larger issue: The gay community has made sexual assault an appealing and casual art form. Gay culture doesn’t just tolerate sexual assaults, it encourages them, particularly in gay bars; it’s a pervasive problem that we need to take responsibility for. Many of us have been there. We’re all too familiar with the caressing touch of a strange hand on our butts in the club and, personally, I’ve become accustomed to the unwanted crotch grabs from men I barely know, if at all.
Sexual assault affects every community, but the gay community has had particular difficulty confronting it because its victims can also be perpetrators. Sexuality and sexual expression are huge parts of gay culture and many of the spaces gay men create for themselves are hypersexualized. Advertisements for gay nightlife or events frequently feature hot dudes in states of undress and, in the clubs, muscle-clad gogo boys dance on the bar for our entertainment. If there isn’t a chance we might get laid, you can almost guarantee many of us won’t be going. However, these spaces do and should represent more than just lust and sex. They are sanctuaries of our culture. In the heterosexual-dominated spaces of the outside world, we might be subjected to bigotry for expressing our sexuality. Gay bars and gay venues offer a safe environment to celebrate our sexuality, free of judgment. Yet as we’ve built fences to protect us from the hatred of the outside world, we’ve forgotten the need to protect the people inside of it as well.
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